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Adventures! In! Spamland!

25 January 2012 @ 18:06

Not only do we read each and every comment you all leave here at TCOTS, but we enjoy reading the spam messages we get before I send them into the  black hole of the Trash Bin [aka: Christine Pelosi’s Who-Who].  Most are just the same old, same old.  But, occasionally, one proves to be somewhat interesting and unintentionally humorous.  Also, they can provide a situation well-disposed to our showcasing of our marvellous wits.

All of the gang here at the TCOTS Redoubt have taken on the duty of responding to the many interesting spam messages we receive.

1) From Q. Strakoucloun:

Diabetic wound healing.

Bob: I think you want Paula Deen’s site.

2) From Andreiash Andery:

Hello there, simply turned into aware of your blog thru Google, and found that it is really informative. I’m gonna watch out for brussels.

Bob: Not the Flemish Menace again!?!

Hagbard Celine: I don’t like the Belgians because they spit on people a lot.

Bob: That’s not what the ‘Flem’ in Flemish stands for, Hagbard.

Lord Fatheringay Von Whoopsie: No one likes the Belgians, dear boy.  At best they are tolerated.

3) From Audrey Pasagrante:

But what does he mean by “were you alive when you died ” That is the part that got me to thinking a lot about my life.

Hagbard: First things first: you need to get a life and I can help…if you’re good-looking and have a decent rack.

Bob: You’ll have to ask Joe Hill.

4) From Nomoobs James:

Man boobs are really embarrassing! It’s best to get rid of them.

Bob: Yeah, tell us about it.  We’re trying to get rid of the ones in The White House and over at the DOJ.

Hagbard: I think you want Richard McEnroe’s site.

5) From Sidoiuoui Wou Wou:

Beautiful site.  Only dirt cheap airline tickets.

Bob: Ah, I think you want to talk with Stacy McCain.

Hagbard: How cheap is dirt these days?  I don’t have a clue ’cause I’ve been concentrating on gold and silver, but I’ve always had a special interest in dirt mining stocks.  Call me and let’s do lunch with Glenn Beck.

Dr. Clyde ‘Fingers’ Proctor: Instead of ‘Wou Wou’, shouldn’t it be ‘Weeee Weeee’?

6) From Florida:

This will be a terrific web site, could you be involved in doing an interview about how you created it? If so e-mail me!

Bob: Well, I guess I’ve finally really made it in The Blogosphere: a whole state wants to interview me!

Hagbard: Well…it depends [Get it? Florida, old people, Depends?].

7) From Alfred Awkward:

Come see out the newest free casual dating and casual sex site!

Hagbard: I gather you won’t be there.

8) From Randolph Mysak:

you’re seriously pathetic even a monkey will do it better than you

Bob: Friend of Wayne’s, huh?

Hagbard: Everybody’s got something to hide, ‘cept for me and my monkey.

9) From Sharameet El Arab:

I must say you have very nice site and I love arab street hookers, arab slut, arab hot, arab milf, naked arab women, arab dancers,

Bob: I’m happy for you. 

Hagbard: Something tell’s me you and I are going to be good friends.

10) From Genital Warts For Men:

What gives me the impression that your here because you are concerned you may have an abnormal vagina or you know someone that has

Hagbard: Is this the modern, 21st Century version of the Hair Club For Men?

Bob: Ah, I think you want Paris Hilton’s site.

11) From Wifebucket:

Fastidious response in return of this question with firm arguments and describing the whole thing about that.

Bob: What exactly is a ‘Wifebucket’?

Dr. Proctor: A medical term we OB-GYN’s use…nothing to concern yourself with.

Hagbard: You related to Sarah Palin?

12) From Real Web Cam Sex:

I like your work!!!

Bob: The feeling’s mutual.

13) From Mrs Undaynite:

Please help us… We try to kill the Tobonga with a mighty fire. But it did not die…

Bob: Many moons, my tribe try to kill Tobonga, but he stay in White House of Great Chiefs.

7 Comments
  1. 25 January 2012 @ 22:46 22:46

    I get lots of spam in foreign languages, and they are very boring.

    I really like that little piggy, Maxwell, he looks like he’s having fun.

  2. 25 January 2012 @ 23:47 23:47

    Please post a warning next time for readers who are trying to eat/drink. Ouch! {snort}

    • thecampofthesaints permalink
      26 January 2012 @ 07:36 07:36

      Apologies tendered. I’m sending you a set of Sham-Wows.

  3. 27 January 2012 @ 02:10 02:10

    Hi my loved one! I want to say that this post is awesome, nice written and come with almost all vital infos. I would like to see more posts like this.

    • thecampofthesaints permalink
      27 January 2012 @ 07:41 07:41

      I knew it would happen! The PM and her people have gotten to you! You’re now a member of the Gillard Collective! Arrrggghhh!!!!!

  4. 27 January 2012 @ 14:51 14:51

    I laughed so hard it hurt. Your fault.

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  1. I like my spam fresh… « The mind is an unexplored country.

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