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Adventures! In! Spamland!

27 August 2011 @ 06:04

Not only do we read each and every comment you all leave here at TCOTS, but we enjoy reading the spam messages we get before I send them into the  black hole of the Trash Bin [aka: Rachael Lloyd’s Who-Who].  Most are just the same old, same old.  But, occasionally, one proves to be somewhat interesting and unintentionally humorous.  Also, they can provide a situation well-disposed to our showcasing of our marvellous wits.

All of the gang here at the TCOTS Redoubt have taken on the duty of responding to the many interesting spam messages we receive.

1) From Forex Funnel:

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather…Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Bob: Listen Clyde…I handle the schtick around here.

Hagbard Celine: Too bad you weren’t one of them.

Lord Fatheringay Von Whoopsie: Forex, I think I used you that time Marianne Faithful, Sandy Dennis, and I stayed in my bedchamber for a week.  Well done, dear boy.

2) From Waterfall:

Dude, please tell me that youre going to write more. I notice you havent written another blog for a while (Im just catching up myself). Your blog is just too important to be missed. Youve got so much to say, such knowledge about this subject it would be a shame to see this blog disappear. The internet needs you, man!

Hagbard: Now listen very carefully, man: put the Harvest album on repeat play, stick your head between your legs, close your eyes, and think only of unicorns.  Do this for at least a day, man, and you’ll ride out the trip just fine.

Bob: I don’t know Hagbard, he sounds quite sober to me.  Surveys show I do have a big Back-To-Nature-Libertarian set of fans out there.

3) From Diopiepoipoipw46:

I have the same Darvocet here.

Hagbard: Sorry to disappoint you, but I make my own in Doc Proctor’s lab.

4) From Bulp Liaivolla:

In my opinion you commit an error. I can defend the position. Write to me in PM.

Bob: In my opinion, someone with your name should never be taken seriously.  Especially considering your name sounds like the medical name for part of a female’s genitalia.

5) From Google:

I liked your article.

Is an interesting technology

Thanks to google I found you

Bob: Thanks.  I would’ve been really worried if you had used Bing.

6) From Fat Cow Hosting:

Great stuff from you, man. Ive read your stuff before and youre just too awesome. I love what youve got here, love what youre saying and the way you say it. You make it entertaining and you still manage to keep it smart. I cant wait to read more from you. This is really a great blog.

Bob: Always nice to hear from Rosie O’Donnell’s IP provider — thanks.

7) From Pakistan Music Idol:

This is a truly wonderful blog post. Looks like you have been publishing for a while, if not, keep it up because this is nice stuff. I like it so much, I linked to it at, check it out sometime!

Bob: I think you want Hagbard.

Hagbard: I use nothing less than 8mm thickness on me bedliners.  BTW: Love how you guys blow-up the contestants you vote down.

8) From Wholesale Galvanni:

I feel that is a captivating point, it made me suppose a bit. Thanks for sparking my pondering cap. Now and again I get such a lot in a rut that I just really feel like a record.

Bob: I’d demand your money back from that English class if I were you, Guido.

9) From Eldery Residents:

Can I just say, this blog is what got me by means of the day right now. Every single time I read it, I just get far more and a lot more excited about whats next. Quite refreshing weblog and quite refreshing suggestions. Im glad that I came across this when I did. I adore what youve got to say and also the way you say it.

Bob: While we appreciate all of our senior friends out there, I can’t help but think that you folks should get to the bingo game a lot more often.

Hagbard: And stop sending me those semi-nude Tweets, ladies — wearing just Depends ain’t sexy.

10) From Nkldnwjnkwehkuhw52:

What is BBW sex online?

Bob: Not as good as BBW sex offline.

11) From Lacey Main:

You’ve got great insights about the whore house love shack, keep up the good work!

Bob: We try.

  1. 27 August 2011 @ 08:15 08:15

    The whore house love shack…Lovely. Frigging hilarious.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      28 August 2011 @ 18:57 18:57

      Well, actually, it was Hagbard who did the undercover work there.

  2. 27 August 2011 @ 09:38 09:38

    I get lots of spam in russian? I’m sure it’s just as stupid.
    I get a notify email, and of course it automatically NEVER gets published!

  3. Adobe Walls permalink
    27 August 2011 @ 18:21 18:21

    Ya gotta admit the one about dying like his grandfather was pretty funny.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      28 August 2011 @ 18:58 18:58

      Quite true, but I’m the funny guy around here.


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