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Adventures! In! Spamland!

05 August 2011 @ 20:59

Not only do we read each and every comment you all leave here at TCOTS, but we enjoy reading the spam messages we get before I send them into the  black hole of the Trash Bin [aka: Amanda Marcotte’s Who-Who].  Most are just the same old, same old.  But, occasionally, one proves to be somewhat interesting and unintentionally humorous.  Also, they can provide a situation well-disposed to our showcasing of our marvellous wits.

All of the gang here at the TCOTS Redoubt have taken on the duty of responding to the many interesting spam messages we receive.

1) From Penis Enlargement Pills:

There are a lot of strange comments on here.

Bob: Coming from you, that’s a comment to be taken seriously, slacker.

2) From Darell Magraw:

I love the comments on this blog, it really gives it that community sense!

Bob: As long as it doesn’t give it that community organizer sense, we’re happy.

3) From Lurlene Himmelwright:

You Have some intriguing ideas! Maybe I should to think about doing this by my self.

Hagbard: Considering it’s probably not the only thing you do by yourself with a name like that, I’d say go for it.

The Right Reverend Murray Schadenfreude-Zeitgeist: Heil Merkel!

Bob: You don’t live in Alsace, perchance?  [Hey…I gotta have some pun around here now and again]

4) From Ariane de Rothschild:

You can certainly see your expertise in the paintings you write. The Sector hopes for more passionate writers such as you who are not afraid to say how they believe. At all times go after your heart.

Bob: Why thank you, Miss de Rothschild. It means so much to an artist when a person of such high-standing as yourself shows appreciation of the struggles we humble painters go through.  Why I was just thinking…

Hagbard [interrupting]: Cut the crap, Belvedere…Look, Ariane, can your family [or ‘The Sector’ or ‘Illuminati’ or whatever you’re calling it these days] lend us a few shekels?

5) From Pharmc508:

Hello! efcbdbf interesting efcbdbf site!

Bob: I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to enforce the rule that commentators at TCOTS not write with their mouths full…next

6) From League Of Legends:

Well, all things considered…

Hagbard: Wrong website and wrong side of the political spectrum, dungbat.

7) From Glinda Brackney:


Hagbard: Well hello there to you, Glinda…ever been to this joint before?  That’s a Swedish name, isn’t it?

Bob: Oh don’t mind him, Miss Brackney.  You see, Hagbard’s been going through a bit of a dry spell lately, but he’s really harmless since we took away his quatloos.

8) From Trainer Joe:

Incredible… now Heather Mills and Paul McCartney are involved in the phone hacking scandal. Is there no end to it?

Hagbard: As for the former, I believe the end is right above the knee.

Bob: As for the latter, the end was when Wings broke up.

9) From Vision:

I really am very interested in learning much more related to the ways we see.

Bob: Well I would hope so, considering your name.

Hagbard: Duh!!!

10) From Alvaro Trettin:

Very interesting points you have remarked, thank you for posting . “Lefty Wise guy dont carry wallets, they carry their money in a roll…. Beaner on the outs” by Donnie Brasco.

Hagbard: Enjoy the rest of Your Trip, man — just remember: Charlie Don’t Surf!

Bob: Rosie O’Donnell carries her weight in a roll, IYKWIMAITYD.

  1. M. Thompson permalink
    06 August 2011 @ 12:07 12:07

    Bob, your fun time with these suckers is quality entertainment.

  2. 06 August 2011 @ 17:59 17:59

    Personally I’m fascinated by the writing style. The spams I receive could have been written by any one of the folks you’ve highlighted here, Bob.
    Maybe there’s an online course. Grammar for the Spammer?

  3. bobbelvedere permalink*
    08 August 2011 @ 18:58 18:58

    MT: Thanks. It’s good for my mental health to do it now and again.

    GN6: Never trust Google Translate for anything beyond a phrase or two.

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