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ABC Can’t Handle The Truth

22 April 2010 @ 18:03

The other day, I posted the happy news that the trend in the entertainment business is to no longer favor women with surgically enhanced cleavage.  As I indicated at the time, the victory we achieved in The War Of The Cleavage was  not in vain.

Sadly, there are, as is to be expected in the aftermath on any war, pockets of resistance still fighting for their lost cause.  Such is the case at the American Broadcasting Corporation, as this report by Maxine Shen and David Li, over at the New York Post, points out:

ABC is issuing a “fat”-wa against full-figured models, plus-size label Lane Bryant says.

The Disney-owned network refused to air the brand’s lingerie ad during its hit show “Dancing with the Stars,” saying it bared too much cleavage, a Lane Bryant insider said.

And Lane Bryant thinks the net’s executives are a bunch of prejudiced boobs.

“The cleavage of the plus-size models, they said, was excessive, and we don’t think that’s the case,” said the source.

“It certainly appears to be discrimination against full-sized women.”

Lane Bryant had been set to launch its campaign for Cacique, its new lingerie line, during “Dancing” this week.

After the ad was pulled, the company posted the too-sexy-for-TV spot on its Web site yesterday.

In it, a pleasantly plump model gracefully shows off her curves before the camera in a slew of sexy poses.

“Mom always said beauty is skin deep,” a voice-over says. “Somehow, I don’t think this is what Mom had in mind.”

Lane Bryant said Fox, too, had originally balked at showing the ad on “American Idol.”

But a Lane Bryant insider noticed that a sexy Victoria’s Secret lingerie spot starring a skinny model had been slotted for “Idol” Tuesday night and complained about a double standard. That caused Fox to change its tune, the source said.

“They wouldn’t run the ad, but have you seen the Victoria’s Secret spots? If you saw the Victoria’s Secret spot and our spot, you’d see nothing different,” the source added.

As I stated: this is to be expected.  Recall, if you will, at the end of World War II in the Pacific, some Japs held out in bunkers for years until they could finally be convinced that the war had, indeed, ended in ignominious defeat for the Empire Of Japan.  Same here.  We just have to be patient.

As Commanding General in the late war, I felt it my duty to look into this matter to make sure Lane Bryant was correct and not suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder.  So, I did extensive research [I know, I know, you may thank me later] and it is my firm and hard belief that there is nothing offensive to be found in the commercial in question and, further, that ABC is in severe denial of the reality that we now live in a world that is safe for natural cleavocracy.

But, I am just one man…

You be the judge: the video is here and here are screenshots that I captured as part of my investigation:

A special thank you to Russ, Commander of the That’s Right Division, for graciously handing over this matter to me.

  1. 22 April 2010 @ 18:12 18:12

    They didn’t want this on Dancing with the Stars?

    Have they seen some of those outfits on that show? Guys ain’t watching it for the footwork.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 18:58 18:58

      And Charlie, you ain’t watching for the gals [except, perhaps, to get fashion tips].

  2. 22 April 2010 @ 18:12 18:12

    Damn sockpuppet.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 18:59 18:59

      It’s okay Dave: we conservatives are very accepting…Hell, we once supported Lindsey ‘Light Loafer’ Graham and Charlie ‘Charlene’ Crist.

  3. Adrienne permalink
    22 April 2010 @ 18:37 18:37

    “it is my firm and hard belief “ – not touching that one – oh my, this just keeps getting worse. heh

    Personally, I would like to see all those types of ads off the air. That being said – in my opinion those Lane Bryant models are gorgeous. The Victoria Secret models are really creepy looking.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 19:01 19:01

      I agree. Message to the owners of Victoria Secret: use some of your millions to buy the gals sandwiches!

  4. 22 April 2010 @ 19:47 19:47

    This goes back to my other rant I had on your post the other day.

    there’s nothing wrong with this girl. She’s very beautiful. She’s obviously not fat either but she is a big and curvy girl. And there is nothing wrong with that except for society likes to see stick thin, clavicle skinny women. TV and ad execs exalt the super skinny body type as queen and women who don’t know any better starve themselves skinny trying to reach that unattainable goal.

    All because they think that’s the standard of beauty.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 23:09 23:09

      You mean the ‘sub-standard of beauty’.

  5. 22 April 2010 @ 19:57 19:57

    Full-size girls! Bellies and bottoms and boobs, oh my.

    It’s interesting that you introduce the image of the Japanese soldiers who held out and starved in caves for years after the war, since that picture regularly comes to mind on encountering what passes for female “beauty” these days.

    That and concentration camp survivors.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 23:08 23:08

      You too, huh?

  6. Lipton T. Bagg permalink
    22 April 2010 @ 21:20 21:20

    Gorgeous woman. ABC is whacked for not doing the ads.

    (That loud, hollow sound just heard was Ms. LTB smacking me upside the head after watching the video – for the 10th time…)

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 23:06 23:06

      Explain to her that its art.

  7. 22 April 2010 @ 21:54 21:54

    Much obliged General. Terrific work.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      22 April 2010 @ 23:07 23:07

      Thanks for the gift.

      • 22 April 2010 @ 23:09 23:09

        Issues of such importance are better left to higher-ups in the chain of command. I know my position.

  8. 24 April 2010 @ 00:40 00:40

    In one word: wow. This is One. Real. Woman.

    What happened: they hired a fashion photographer who’s actually straight for a change?

    Minus points for the background music of the ad though: Chopin’s 20th Prelude in C minor is music for mourning, not the celebration of life that’s looking at a beautiful woman.

    • bobbelvedere permalink*
      24 April 2010 @ 01:14 01:14

      Tune in tomorrow as I have decided to spotlight her in my Rule 5 Saturday posting.


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