Hey Ladies: Five Easy Steps To Become A Feminist!
In the course of reporting on the National Young Feminist Leadership Conference, Stacy McCain services all you young, budding womyn out there by devising the following easy peasy way of achieving a victory over the Heteronormative Patriarchy™©†:
After seeing these feminist festivities, I’m sure many young women are asking, “What can I do? I’d like to be a feminist, but I can’t afford to attend a national conference or spend years getting a Women’s Studies degree from an elite private university.”
Relax, ladies. Becoming a feminist is actually very simple:
- Get an abortion;
- Become a lesbian;
- Vote Democrat;
- Cats. Lots of cats.
You’re welcome. Always glad to help.
Stacy did forget one step — and it is a key one — that is essential if you want to Immanentize The FemQueer Eschaton:
5. Be neurotic.
Remember: Mental illness is a plus and a must — the more the merrier.
Unlike Stacy, you don’t have to thank me, gals…just make me a sammich.
Bob ‘Bigus Dickus’ Belvedere